In our social relationships, we often emphasize negativity, complain and experience disappointments. In reality, we today have been shaped by our environment, whether positive or negative. In this, we often neglect the positive contributions of our social environment.
I will not go back to our birth and deepen the subject with the rights of our parents and family on us. If we try to describe them, we cannot fit them even in a few books. Teachers, lecturers and other educators also have a great contribution to us today, and volumes are not enough for that.
We also have friends; Friends who have always given for free, have not entered into an expectation and have not sought an account.
Friends who came to us in our most difficult moments, shared our problems and tried to find solutions.
Some friendships can turn into disappointments over time. The pain of knowing your friend wrong is unbearable. In reality, most of the time the situation is not what it seems and you are wrong. The best thing to do is to leave it to time, get tired and pray for the continuation of friendship.
Most of the time, you did not understand how some of your problems were solved. However, a friend of yours took care of it without you noticing. They do not have any expectation of being appreciated or appreciated by you. Friendship is for Allah. There is never any financial concern.
However, sometimes there is such a great expectation that we ignore the sacrifices our friends have made for us all this time, and we make the world narrow for them. Our unfair and overreactive attitude sometimes injures friendships. But we know it won’t last long. A small smile, a simple hello makes you forget everything. A cup of coffee, on the other hand, re-establishes friendship bridges.
You consult with them at every important turning point in life. They take care of you as if it is their own issue and try to find solutions without getting tired. Your problem is their problem, your joy is their joy. They are not jealous of your success and happiness. On the contrary, they enthusiastically tell others about your successes as if they were their own.
Before you publish your article, you send it to him/her to get ideas. Appreciation blows you away, criticism angers you. However, a friend tells pain. But you care about the reactions from him. That’s why the excess of your reactions…
Some of your friends have always given for years and you have only been the takers. Maybe they need you now. Friendship is not one sided. You must support them in their difficult times.
There are also those who pray for you constantly, always want your well-being, and are friends only for the sake of Allah.
Especially in this period, true friends are very few. It is necessary to appreciate the things that exist, not to complain about them constantly, and to call and express our gratitude from time to time. We are very negligent about this. Now is the time to repair relationships and build a stronger social network.
These days, the voices of those who are outside the “friendship network” have started to rise and affect friendships. When we listened to the voices in the neighborhood, we questioned friendships. “If you want to lead the orchestra, you have to turn your back on the crowd” says M. Lucado. It should not be forgotten that the biggest crowd is social media.
Indeed, it is best to create our own echo chamber with our friends and exclude outside noises. Keeping friendships intact should be our top priority.
“A friend is the one who defends your right and law where you are not.” Hz. Ali
Aykut GÜL
Note: This is the English version of my Medium article titled “Dostlar Şimdi Daha Değerli”
