Beyond Acquaintance
“The best time to get to know people is right before they leave,” says Anton Çehon. If there is a showdown, ignoring, anger, raising one’s voice, insults and more, curses at the time of separation… Oh my God! You have never been friends!
In this case, the best thing is to come to terms with your past once and close the book never to open it again.
If there is deep pain, sadness, good wishes, prayers and even a few drops of tears at the time of separation… How beautiful! That’s real friendship!
Let your past remain as sweet memories and beautiful experiences.
By preserving a small hope that friendships can continue one day in the future.
Beyond Çehon’s determination of “… right before they leave”, in the following periods, your opinion that you do not know your friend at all becomes stronger and stronger. Increasingly rare obligatory contacts are signs that your friends even want to reach you.
A small message, a get-well wish, or a blessing prayer you receive from some of your friends after breaking up can make friendships bloom again and change your mood.
“Do not be afraid to test people to get to know them,” says Seneca, “Because what needs to be lost must be lost first.”
However, the problem is that in our understanding, friends are not tested. The relationship that is tested is not friendship, but perhaps just an ordinary friendship.
The friendship that is very rare today, that most of us never find, is as İmam Gazali describes it: “Sometimes such love arises between two people that the reason for this is neither beauty nor any other worldly benefit; it is entirely the harmony between souls.”
Or as Fethi Gemuhluoğlu wonderfully describes it, “A friend is someone who wipes away tears without letting the eye notice.”
Have you ever had such friends? What do you think?
Aykut GÜL
